purpose vs reason

It's amazing how one's perspective can change in one day.  It's amazing that sometimes it takes horrible things to make you realize the things that are truly important.

Let's just say that today, I hope that I've learned a little something in the past 48 hours that makes me really appreciate things and makes me change how I react to things.

Let's just HOPE.

I've been thinking lately about my "trials" and when they're going to hit me.  Not to say that I haven't had trials, but I haven't had anything even in comparison to so many of my friends and acquaintances.  I suppose that means that I have a lot of spiritual preparation ahead of me before I'm able to handle anything like that.  I think I have a long way to go.

I could go back and see some things that have happened in my life and say I have definitely experienced things that have affected me and that I have learned from them.  Some of those things I am extremely grateful for and consider some to be blessings.

So the hot question of the day...
Do things happen for a reason or is there a purpose as to why things happen? 

I've debated this and think that there are many people that debate this as well.  Is there really a difference in the question?

Is there a reason that bad things happen to good people?

Or

Do bad things happen to good people for a purpose?

In my eyes, they are different. 
Reason, to me, is a cause and effect kind of deal. 
Purpose is to find a greater good from something.
Does that make sense?  It does to me.  And I'm just thinking that there isn't a reason that bad things happen to good people.  Things just happen and those good people kind find some kind of purpose out of it.

Rambling.  But thinking.

Blah.

So to my chums, the H family, my heart goes out.

minor freak outs

am i dramatic?

i think as a child i just went with the flow and had a relatively boring life.

now that i'm an adult and all these randomly insane things happen to me, i can't help but get a little agitated, excited, over-stimulated and have little freak-outs.

i don't see them as freak-outs, i see them as me venting my frustrations, angers, excitements, bewilderments, etc. in a loud obnoxious way.

so sue me.

not alot to say

really, i always think i have so much bottled up but when i actually sit down to write it down there's nothing.

nothing.

i think i might try video diary.

Monday, back to reality

i like this.  i like confessing.  because then i feel like i'm not lying.... because i HATE lying.

i slept until 12:30 today.  not actually in my bed... and i did get up and down as i got the kids breakfast, got them off to school, awakened the spouse, changed little B's diaper as needed (i know, she really needs to be potty trained, HELP!) but i dozed on the couch all morning long.  and i hardly feel guilty.  little B bounced on me (i am the best slide, let me tell you).  she rubbed my cheeks and i simply listened as she played pretend with several of her babies.  she is my imaginitive munchkin.  i love it.  she wouldn't let me put pants on her, which i hate. but we weren't going anywhere, so i caved.  then i dozed some more.  i didn't even turn on the computer until 12:40.  then i jumped in the shower and had a wonderful rest of the day.

wonderful.

A New Beginning

It's 2011.

I've had a hard time with "social media" as of late, but I've realized that I shouldn't let other people's "issues" affect me in a way that inhibits me from being me and sharing.  So I'm back.  And I know it's only been 2 months. 

But here's to new things.

To start off, I've come up with one resolution, so far...

Hike to Delicate Arch.  That's a good goal, isn't it?  We went that way this past summer and I failed to accomplish this task.  I could blame this on other people, like Little B, because I'm sure at the time I used this as an excuse, but it's really just me.  I'm unhealthy and figured I'd make a fool of myself had I even attempted it.  And it was hot, and I had already felt like I was going to die just at the lookout point.  So, there you have it... a confession. 

So, here's to 2011.  One goal at a time.

*the back story... cause there's a back story to every front story.

this is me waiting for Paco, who made it to the lookout, and had the keys to the car, which had all the water in it.  IT WAS HOT!  Luckily, some family members drove into the parking lot and left us a bottle of water.

This was Paco's view from the viewpoint.  It's seriously beautiful.  I'm still kicking myself for not even making it this far.  blargheurowiejfalksdjvoapdi.

This was the best view I got.